LILY & JAMES Written by Mom, Shelby

Being the parent of two kids with disabilities is wonderful, hard, and different. It takes more for my kids to achieve things. I don't know what the milestones were supposed to be. Lily didn't walk until about three, and James didn't walk until he was four with a reverse walker. I take it all with a grain of salt. I'm blessed I have a husband with an amazing sense of humor, which he passed to our daughter, Lily. She has the best knock-knock jokes. We take everything in stride. Being their parents has really given us respect for being patient. It comes with a lot of hardships, hospital visits, sickness, and medical issues, but also a lot of smiles and jokes.

Lily’s had seven surgeries and you would never guess looking at her. Her energy brightens the room. She takes every challenge and wants to be part of everything. She is so social and wants to be your friend. She wants to be like everyone else. When we were in the NICU, I didn't think she was going to make it. The first surgery was nine hours, and she was tiny. I was so excited when I got to walk out of that hospital three and a half months later with my baby and bring her home. What a huge day that was. Then along came James. We were shocked when we found out we were having a second baby with Down syndrome. But James and Lily, you couldn't have two better kids together. Having a dual diagnosis of Down syndrome and autism was a hard one to swallow. But the things he has accomplished and when he looks at you… His empathy is one of the things I’m most proud of. If others could feel the way he feels, our world would be a different place. It is okay to mourn the loss of the healthy baby you thought you were going to have. But make sure you look at the beautiful baby you do have and know they are going to teach you more than you’re going to teach them. They're going to accomplish things, shine in their own way, make you smile and appreciate the small things. As my daughter says, “Mama, take a deep breath. Count to five. It’s okay.”

Include everyone no matter their ability, what they look like, what they believe, their strengths, their weaknesses, or where they come from. Doesn't matter who they are. Just wrap each other up. Love each other. Everybody has a part to be included in. Take that extra step. We need more people like that.

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"Belonging"